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Day 51. in which there is fuzzy cheese on the staircase.

Don't you ever throw cheese on the staircase again!

Had I actually just said this? Had anyone actually ever said this? Lily had decided she was not going to eat the slice of cheese Dana had given her, nor was she going to throw it out. She had deposited it on the staircase like this was a perfectly natural thing to do. When I asked her to pick it up and throw it out, she refused. She simply said, "I can't."

Dana was about to make her pick it up, but he's kind of a sucker for Lily and noticed there was fuzz on the cheese, which was why she was particularly hesitant to touch it. Fuzzy cheese is just gross. So, as I watched Dana pick up the cheese that Lily had slopped on the staircase, I sternly said...

Don't you ever throw cheese on the staircase again!

A second later I was trying not to choke from laughing because it was just so absurd.

My own childhood was full of mysterious commands that never made much literal sense, but were figuratively masterful. Despite Bob Brown's elusive comments, I still got the gist of what they meant.

What do you think we have? Stock in NiMo?

This was something I heard a lot. I had no idea what stock was nor did NiMo mean anything to me. When my father was yelling this, I knew this meant to turn off the lights. (For those of you outside of the Capital Region of NY, NiMo is the electric company there.)

Arise and shine, thou sluggard! Slothfuliness is sinfulness!

Our family didn't frequent a Church. I knew this meant to get out of bed.

You buy her books and you buy her books, but all she does is chew the covers.

My Dad said that one to me a lot when I was a teenager...I try to block out all of the stupid things I did as a teenager so let's not discuss what he was telling me when he said this!

How can I compare with Dad's edicts?

Don't you ever throw cheese on the staircase again!

I'm really going to have to work on this...